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S. Michael Houdmann
Supporter
The Bible nowhere mentions cyber sex or phone sex, obviously, because "cyber-anything" and "phone-anything" were not possible in Bible times. The Word of God does give us some principles that apply...
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Chris Dibbern
Supporter
Yes, unless it's with your wife (or husband). There's nothing inherently wrong with phone sex; it's all in what we do with it. I can picture spouses wanting to help each other avoid temptation by using different kinds of "remote" sex, and I think that's more beneficial than hurtful (it might make you miss them, more, briefly after you're done). If someone were to engage in this beneficial form of phone sex, I'd recommend also focusing on remote "dating" and other forms of non-sexual intimacy to maintain a well-rounded, healthy relationship. Video chat, if you have internet and a computer, hand-written love letters (with exotic-looking international stamps!), pictures of your interesting experiences throughout the day or week ("look at this weird thing I ate for lunch in Brazil!"). Be creative. :-)
Chris Dibbern
Supporter
It occurs to me that a simple "yes" here might seem insufficient. If you're like me, you like to understand why it's a sin, especially since we do not have an arbitrary God, but a God who "did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all--how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" (Romans 8:32) God will give us anything, if it's truly good. God tells us in Romans 13:8 that love fulfills the law. Therefore, phone sex, if it is in love, is fine. In fact, in love, it's more than fine - it's good! However, from a Biblical perspective, that can only happen with your spouse, after marriage (Proverbs 5:15). The reason this applies to phone sex is that phone sex stimulates desires. Like chocolate, or money, or caffeine, it makes us more likely to want more. It stimulates lusts, and it involves unclean thinking. If you found out someone where you work, or go to school, was sitting around in their basement, day and night, dreaming up ways to take out their frustrations, to exact their revenge, on their peers, but promised they had no intention ever doing it, how would you feel about that? Not very safe or secure around them, I bet. So it is with all unclean thinking - your mind is a simulator, preparing you for whatever you charge it with.
Danny Hickman
Supporter
Any sex or sexual desire with, for, around, or whatever else can be said, other than your spouse is an offense, period... Sexual contact in whatever form, or however performed with your spouse, with the right intentions of your Heart, is not offensive. But there's the snare; your Heart's intentions. My suggestion is to relax and enjoy your spouse and to avoid everyone else. Continue to confess your sinful condition of living in flesh and be cleansed. Confession is sorta like a spiritual bath; and we who wish to be presentable bathe daily, sometimes multiple times, depending on our activities. Praise The Lord for all His provisions to us.
Sayialel Ole Pasiany
Supporter
Sex between people who are not married to each other is a sin. This includes all kinds of sex, yes cyber/phone sex too.
Vincent Mercado
Supporter
First things first - cyber sex and phone sex do not count as intercourse because the two are not in the same room together. Cyber sex or phone sex is masturbation while speaking to another person remotely by internet chat or phone, respectively. Whether one person does it or both, masturbation is a sin. It is not cyber sex or phone sex if no one is masturbating. That would simply be a conversation with a lustful topic, which is also sin.
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