S. Michael Houdmann Supporter Got Questions Ministries

The word abuse has taken many meanings over time. Immediately, most assume abuse involves anger or some form of physical violence. This is a simplistic and often misleading view of abuse. Anger is ...

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July 01 2013 • 1 response • Vote Up • Share • Report

Jeffrey Johnson Supporter

What does the Bible say about abuse?

We see these condemned in the Bible, and guilt is assigned to the abuser: Using power to oppress others is condemned (Eccl 4:1). Hitting another is condemned in Exodus 21:26–27. Causing trouble in the household and bringing ruin to a family is condemned in Proverbs 11:29.

In the Bible, all violence is considered an offence against God and against humanity. 

God's Word is full of condemnations of violence – time and again, violence is associated with wickedness and condemned as "detestable to the Lord" (Psalm 11, Proverbs 3 & 10). In particular, violence against women is condemned.

The Bible doesn't use the label "emotional abuse," but it does prohibit it. 

First, we are not to curse people who have been created in the image of God (James 3:9). 

Second, emotional abuse violates the two greatest commandments: love God and love others as yourself (Matthew 22:35-40). 

Third, emotional abuse violates God's design for marriage where the husband lovingly leads, and the wife lovingly submits (Ephesians 5:21-33). 

Fourth, it violates Christian living by denying yourself (Mark 8:34) and speaking wholesome words (Ephesians 4:29). 

Fifth, it displays pride and a lack of fear of God, which leads to destruction (Proverbs 16:18). 

Sixth, emotional abuse is a betrayal of God and people by trying to be like God and deceiving others.

There are some common themes in "Emotional Abuse":

Please note that this can shift to the husband from the wife:

Anger. Emotionally abusive anger is a sin (Colossians 3:8). In this case, it reveals a desire for control. For example, a husband sends texts or calls throughout the day from work and gets angry if the wife responds too slowly. Or, he gets angry if she disagrees with him.

Fear/Threats. In some cases, this involves finances or child custody if the couple is in the process of a divorce.

Blameshifting/Denial. "If you did what I told you to do, then I wouldn't have been angry." "When did I say that to you?"

Isolation. The wife spends less time with family and friends because her husband does not want to see them, or because another argument breaks out.

Minimising the problem. The husband says that the wife is exaggerating. Sometimes, the wife minimises the problem. Another instance is when the person trying to help is deceived or doesn't know how to help. "Every marriage has problems." "Both the husband and wife have issues."

Read Psalm 11:5. "Jehovah trieth the righteous; But the wicked and him that loveth violence his soul hateth." This passage is a terrifying reminder that God hates not just abuse but abusers themselves.

The well-known British writer Malcolm Muggeridge pointed out that people love power "...because [they] have not realised that the basis of human life is love... But basically, the urge for power is very dangerous. It's one that Jesus Christ declined to have."

History is filled with the records of men who abused power to their own aggrandisement and to the harm of their fellowmen. Think, for example, of Alexander the Great, Charlemagne, Napoleon, and Hitler.

Proverbs 8:13 says: "Jehovah fears to hate evil: Pride, and arrogancy, and the evil way, And the perverse mouth, do I hate."

God's words impel us to turn aside from evil, Proverbs 16:6. "By mercy and truth iniquity is atoned for; And by the fear of Jehovah men depart from evil."

Isaiah 13:11: "And I will punish the world for their evil, and the wicked for their iniquity: and I will cause the arrogancy of the proud to cease, and will lay low the haughtiness of the terrible."

We can be assured that the Most High will not, for all time, tolerate being reproached, and the abuse of power will end.

3 days ago • 0 responses • Vote Up • Share • Report