How do you help a person who is dealing with recovering from pornographic sin? He has been delivered but this sin keeps on attacking him. Please advise.
Romans 2:9
ESV - 9 There will be tribulation and distress for every human being who does evil, the Jew first and also the Greek.
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I was married to a pornographer for 15 years. When we met, he said it was his business but not his lifestyle (he sold x rated mags to the adult shops). After we married I started to learn different. I prayed for him to come to Christ and have a conversion, to no avail. He was a great husband in all ways except for the porn and his kinky ideas which all stemmed from the porn. In the 3rd year of our marriage he told me point blank never to make him have to chose between me and his business, because he would choose his business. I knew then all I could do was pray and lead by example. 15 years of marriage and he was getting worse. I had to make the decision to leave the marriage. I did tell him that he needed to come to Christ because he was harming himself. I felt that the power of the Holy Spirit spoke to him through me in the end, when I told him that if he did not leave that life behind that he would lose everything...wife, family, business, finances, the house and finally his health....none of it by my hand, but by the hand of God. He laughed. This all came to pass exactly as I said, and yet he still continues to live in rebellion. My opinion is that first a person must want with all his heart to be healed of that sin. Secondly he must plant his feet firmly in Jesus and resist while at the same time praying to the Holy Spirit to reinforce his strength. At the name of Jesus, the demons will flee if that person truly believes in the power of God. Zechariah 4:6 says Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit saith the Lord Continue to pray for this person. Ask God to give you strength to help him break all the chains of pornography.
This is a stronghold that the enemy will use at any time to distract your loved one. He needs to ask the Lord for refuge and shelter and also remember 1 Corinthians 10:13 “There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.” It is also important to remember that Satan will not only tempt your loved one with the besetting sin but put self condemnation in his mind. Satan and his minions attack in many ways. Their attacks are meant to distract us from the Lord and keep us from walking with him. With the strength and help of the Holy Spirit, there is nothing that cannot be overcome. Praise the living God!
This is a plague in our society, in our homes and in our lives today. Whether you are male or female, no matter your size, no matter your maturity, your marital status, your financial condition, your church attendance or if you hold a position in the church, you can be sucked into Satan's grasp of pornography! You may think that just "adding a little spice to your marriage" is harmless, BUT it is a slippery slope that Satan uses to drag you into this world. First, I want to address how God intended the marriage bed to really be. What it truly represents. God said that a man and a woman would become one flesh. Meaning they would mesh together not just in their bodies, (this is the easy part) but also in their spirits and their souls. When God looks at a joined couple He wants to see oneness, unity that reflects Himself. God the Father is united with God the Holy Spirit and God the Son. The uniting of a couple is a reflection of this unity that is in Heaven. As a man and woman come together in prayer (spirit) and Word (soul) then they join their bodies, they are showing on earth what is in Heaven. Trust me, with this is mind, you will never again need to try to spice up anything! God provides the "Heavenly Spice!" Second, what fallen man has done since Adam the first, he has reversed God's order! Man wants the body first, and who cares if the spirit and soul is ever brought together? Well, God cares! That is why there is never any real satisfaction. Something always feels like it is missing. You are always looking for that next big or bigger satisfaction. This is where Satan comes in. Very sly at first, try this little thing. I would be amiss if I did not say here, men and women are totally different how they approach sex. Men are turned on by what they see. They see something attractive and it turns on their sexual energies! It doesn't take much because they also use their imagination with their eyes to imagine how, what, when, their new object would be theirs. Women on the other hand use their mind to become sexually aroused. Not thinking about the sex act, but of her love and affection for her mate. The porn industry knows this about men and women. For men they have the peep shows to arouse and tantalize. And for women, harlequin romance novels sells by the millions every year.. they even have their own TV station! It's still porn! Soft or not. Third, how does someone who desires to break free.. claim their freedom in Christ Jesus, and be happy and satisfied?mWash in the Blood of the Sacrificial Lamb of God, and wash in the Waters of His Name Death and Life, and study His Word. Paul said: Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Judge for yourself what you are watching, looking at, reading, even who you are hanging with based on this scripture! If it means tossing out the TV, it's just junk news anyway! You can get the weather report on your phone. Be a steward of your eyes, your heart, your mind, your soul! Understand why God instituted the marriage bed. Be committed to turn your sexuality over to the Lord. Ask a close confidant, (same sex) to be a trusted accountability partner. Watch the Fireproof movie, see how he handled his addiction and saved his marriage. While this movie was geared towards men, it would be the same for the ladies. Be blessed, Ms. Lena
After knowing Christ for years (I was saved at age 16, and I’m now 73), I still struggle with this. When I was first saved, it still was a struggle. When I picked up a magazine, the lurid was the first thing I looked for. Even when I picked up a newspaper, the lewd was what I sought. On TV guess what I searched for? I see pornographic temptations online all the time with “fashion” ads, “health” ads online as well as magazine covers. I see it under “fitness” headings all over the place (I’m a fitness nut, too). But recovery cannot occur alone. Scripture tells us, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17). When I finally found myself rationalizing my conviction to not lust while going on such sites as Imgur and that other sites that post stuff online immediately (I’ve forgotten the name now), oh, Tumblr and Pinterest, and posting my Christian thoughts, I knew I was whipped. So I confessed it to my prayer team and asked for their help in praying for me (Let Us Pray for You, American Bible Society). So far, it’s worked—this has been 2 years now!
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