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Tim Maas
Supporter
However serioius a formal engagement may be as a statement of intentions with regard to marriage, I would say that (in this culture at least), it does not carry the same legal weight and protections as marriage, nor does it entitle a couple (or either member of a couple), regardless of how deeply they may care for one another, to engage in the unique sexual relationship that, more than any other single factor (in my opinion) expresses the level of commitment the couple is making to one another, and that underlies God's characterization of a couple who are formally husband and wife as being "one flesh" in His eyes (Genesis 2:24). While sexual relations without that level of commitment are not an unforgivable act, the confining of that relationship to couples who are married in an "official" civil or religious sense is the clearest reflection of God's intent for it -- again, not with the aim of depriving humans of pleasure, but as a way of offering them the greatest level of assurance of the permanence of their relationship.
Jack Gutknecht
Supporter
My opinion is that no, you are not allowed to have sex yet if you're only engaged. I believe you should wait until you are married to have sex. I base my opinion on My favorite verse now/this topic is Hebrews 13:4, “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.” My first favorite verse on this just after I got saved is 1 Corinthians 6:18 says, “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.” Doesn't having sex outside of a marriage, even when you intend to marry, qualify as sexual immorality? What if a couple prayed about the issue and feels at peace about it? 1 Corinthians 7:1-3, “Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband.” (Satan can give "peace", too, a false sense of peace.)
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