How are Christians supposed to forgive those who rape, abuse, and murder children?
As a survivor, and a Christian, I still find it hard to forgive pedophiles and those who molest and murder children.
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Asked April 26 2016
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Susan Jeavons
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For follow-up discussion and general commentary on the topic. Comments are sorted chronologically.
Ken van Zyl
Susan, I have asked myself this question many times, but cannot find the answer.
How does a raped child forgive her attackers for destroying her life and saddling her with trauma that she will suffer for the remainder of her physical life?
It's easy for others to say forgive and forget, but how does one forget?
Are there any theologians that can supply the answers from the Bible?
James Kraft
An unforgiving spirit is human, Forgiveness is divine. In our human state we cannot do it. But vengeance is mine says the Lord. I will repay. When we forgive others God will forgive us as said above. We are to pray for those who use us unfairly and God may heap coals of fire on their head.
But whether He does or not we are still to pray for them. Sometimes he will make an example of them, and other times like Saul, He saves, turns them into Paul, and uses them for His own glory.
When He was the proud Pharisee Saul was persecuting the Lord Himself. But when Jesus saved him he became Paul the greatest preacher that ever lived.
I am always amazed at some of the people that God saves who I never thought possible. God uses the most unlikely people to get His work done. Never discount anyone. Even the vilest sinners can be saved. With God all things are possible.
We are all just as worthy of hell as the worst of the worst. Jesus did not save us because we are good, He saved us because we are sinners and had no hope.
I'm sorry. I just cannot keep from preaching. Part of my heritage I guess. Please do not take offence. I love you all so much.
vanessa pannuti
I personally think that the answer in the Bible is to forgive. There is no other alternative, but Ken is right how do we put forgive and forget into practice? When Jesus was crucified He asked for forgiveness of His own murderers, He asked the Father to forgive them as they knew not what they were doing Luke 23:34
If this means that the murderers were acting under a Satanic influence and this is why they didn't know what they were doing, is very similar to diminished responsibilities, it is not them acting.
Attacking a child is so unnatural that the perpetrators must be acting under some influence or sickness.
Not being able to forgive causes bitterness and separation from God. I watched a movie a few days ago about a church pastor who was driving and collided, he survived but his son and his heavily pregnant wife were all killed.
Three years later his ministry was not as good as it should have been, he was bitter and still had flashbacks about the event, he had not forgiven himself nor others for it.
I think some people don't forgive but forget, it works like a self-defence mechanism, memories that are too unpleasant are forgotten more easily then happy ones.
It is an extremely difficult and lengthy process. I hope that awareness about these criminals will be openly raised and children taught in school how to recognise the signs to prevent many similar incidents.
Susan Jeavons
Thank you all for your comments. I do want to say that I have forgiven the one who abused me. I can even say that I love this person now with all my heart.
It's when I read stories like the one I read yesterday, of a man who sexually abused and sodomized a 6-month-old baby girl, that I have a hard time forgiving. It happens every day, in too many places across the globe.
I use to write for a web site on the topic of child abuse and recovery. I wrote over 70 articles, held chat room discussions with other survivors, and provided email support to many. I stopped after about 7 years because it was too hard on me. Now I simply try to offer love and support to other survivors, and that seems to be what God wants me to do.
Still, I find it does not get any easier with all of the evil in the world today that is perpetrated against innocent children. I will pray and ask God to give me the strength, the courage and the wisdom to continue this mission and to find forgiveness for those who harm children.
Philippians 4:13-I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
God Bless you all.
Jennifer Rothnie
In the case of crimes involving strangers, their debt is not to us. We can't forgive the man - it isn't our debt to forgive. If a man was owed by his brother a thousand dollars, it is doubtful that you would tell him, "I forgave your brother, so he doesn't have to pay you." The debts we forgive are the emotional, monetary, and physical debts owed to us personally.
What we can do is pray for him that he will be convicted of his sin by the Holy Spirit, and that he will open his eyes to Jesus. We can pray for the healing of the child. We can pray for justice in the courts. We can pray that God responds quickly to hurt and oppression wherever it is found, etc.