Anonymous (via GotQuestions)
For follow-up discussion and general commentary on the topic. Comments are sorted chronologically.
alfredo dizon
is it wrong for a father to stick to his vow that the local church he is attending now to be his last church to attend to. even though his wife and kids want to transfer to another local church
Jeremiah Kaaya
For a wife and husband to attend different churches, is the first clear sign that such a couple is faced with pretty more disagreement. There could be such a scenario; wife and husband attending different churches, for a given period of time, say if you just got married and you happened to have come from different churches, but such must not go on longer than necessary.
As a couple, you may not be in agreement on each and everything, however though, as a couple, you must always be willing to find agreement every time you are faced with issues. Unless otherwise, say in case one party is trying to mislead the other, such as forcing the one party into cult worship, or forcing one into un Biblical tendencies, the rest is agreeable.
NB We must always take caution when we choose to marry someone in some of the following ways; 1) pray about it, 2) consult with people close to both of you, 3) take ample time pondering over it. I think such may be part of what could help someone avoid some of such situations. Set parameters that will help you be pretty satisfied why you have finally decided to spend the rest of your life with that person. I have had disagreements with my wife, but because we are not only joined physically but also spiritually, we always find a solution together.
In view of the above, a couple must be members of, and attend the same church. That is the first indication that you are supernaturally joined and therefore destined to be together.
Helena Jones
I believe it goes without saying that you are asking for problems in your marriage if your husband is attending a different church other than yourself. I witness cases as a teenager in church where women left their church after marrying one of the brothers within our church and the first thing they would tell you (the wives who left their church) is that they had to follow their husband where he go they follow.
I also witness the other type, which during my time was a rarity, but there was a couple where the woman did not want to join our church, and her husband would come to church alone without her, and when the saints would ask him where was his lovely new wife, he sheepishly explained, with a hint of embarrasment, that she preferred to go to her own church. Marriage didn't last past three-years! True story.
Danny Hickman
Can you say 'bramble bush counseling'? None of this sounds like it comes from people who value their partner as much as they do other things like power and control. Lots of people with controlling ways never suspect it of themselves. It's like high blood pressure; it's a silent "relationship" killer.
I will never answer anyone "sheepishly" about anything that has to do with Faye. A man who answers like a sheep baa-ing concerning his wife has some other issues with himself! Where I grew up, "She has a headache" actually meant 'MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS'!! Everybody understood it too!
Polite people will allow a man at church alone, to make the first mention of his absentee wife. (a missing husband isn't as interesting as a missing wife; why is that?)
"A woman's place is next to her husband." Gender bigotry, bottom line!
As for there being a problem with a man and woman preferring different religions or different congregations of the same religion, it's only a problem for a CONTROLLING person. Period!! (some of us are so controlling that we even try to control our spouse's eternal place of destiny. Now that's some kind of serious control issue).
Mine are radical views to the traditional believer. The traditional believer often trusts and relies on his/her methods of influence more than the power and sovereignty of God. If God wants them in the same church that's where they will be.
Many of us never learn to let God handle the heavy lifting!! We try to control people.