1 Corinthians 7:9
NLT - 9 But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.
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In context Paul was saying in his opinion, I Cor 7:6-9 Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. A problem that exists today is that pornography is readily available and perhaps in some fashion was in Paul's day as well. The statistics are around 95+% of Christian men deal with pornography at some level or another. If one has begun this lifestyle it will more than likely not be satisfied once one marries. Do not be discouraged because though God is clear about not being involved in any sexual misconduct of any sort. The bible says that He provides a way of escape for us when we are tempted and God does understand that the flesh many times controls us as we allow. He also provided Jesus for our shortcomings. A couple of thoughts; One should not marry just to get a wife because the struggle will still be there, wait for your mate. Gods grace and love cover a multitude of sin, all of our sin. While we were sinners Christ died for us. Our sins were in the future when He died for us. Paul mentioned that he did what he did not want to do and didn't do what he wanted to do but gave reason why it occurs in Romans 7:25.....So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin. Then in Romans 8 he says there is no condemnation for those in Christ and if you are born again you are in Christ that being said, Rom 8:9-10 You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. 10 But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. Don't condemn yourself because God doesn't Know no man after the flesh, that includes yourself. You are the righteousness of God in Christ 2 Cor 5:21 Find someone to talk to because your wife/girlfriend will probably not understand Allow the grace of God to do its job, it teaches us to deny worldly lusts and to live a holy life. Titus 2:11-12 Find resources to help get through this area of your life-https://www.xxxchurch.com/ https://www.xxxchurch.com/x3watch We all burn with passion for one thing or another and none of us are perfect, to focus on the sin means to take our eyes off Jesus and give more attention to the sin than to Jesus. Paul also pointed out that we all have our own gift from God and that one of his gifts is celibacy and he wishes we were all like that but since we aren't then get married. If celibacy is not your gift then focus on the fact that Jesus died for your sin and you are righteous. I am not saying it is okay to sin but what I am saying is that your sin is forgiven and move forward in your walk. When you fall thank God for Jesus and the forgiveness you have in Him, admit to Him you have a weakness and remember what Paul said: 2 Cor 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
In the verse cited in the question, Paul is suggesting that it is better to marry, and thus to have an outlet that is sanctioned by God for sexual desires and tensions, than to allow oneself to be consumed by unfulfilled desire, which may find an outlet in lustful activities (which would include those noted in the question). (As far as men are concerned, I view the process of nocturnal emission as a means provided by God to relieve the build-up of hormonal tension or pressure.). Although God created men and women to be physically attracted to each other, masturbation and pornography involve, at their core, willful, self-centered gratification; the objectifying of members of the opposite sex; and viewing them as existing merely for the purpose of satisfying one's own physical desires, rather than as co-equal partners created in God's image, with their own unique personalities and contributions to make to all aspects of life. In addition, Jesus indicated that such thoughts and desires are the equivalent in God's eyes of sexual activity outside of marriage (whether considered as adultery or fornication), which it was preferable for individuals to eliminate from their lives, rather than for them to be condemned to eternal separation from God as a result of failure to control them (Matthew 5:27-30). In the absence of marriage, I would say that guidance to Christians would be to find productive and God-approved outlets for their time and energy (as Paul did). If marriage is desired, those activities could or should include settings where members of the opposite sex can be encountered under conditions that allow constructive, caring relationships to develop that are based on mutual attraction and respect, as well as shared interests. Christians should also confess and seek God's forgiveness for those occasions when they lapse into lustful thoughts or actions; and ask for the help of the Holy Spirit in strengthening them to resist the temptation to do so.
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