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Marriage is unique in the way that we are to look inward and review ourselves first before attempting to understand the brides love. For example, God says to love your spouse as Jesus lives, lived and loves, loved the church, the bride, (those of us who are believers). Ephesians 5:25-33 (ref the entire chapter). The direction is to each spouse to use Jesus as the focus and example. Jesus did not put a qualifier about the bride loving Him, or he would not have gone to the cross and died for the bride, which He will return for, the bride. In fact the idea He will return shows the bride needs to come into fullness. The bride needs the Holy Spirit to understand and love the groom. Both spouses connected are the bride and individually as Christian believers. In a relationship, we need to self examine if I am loving first, and am I lovable and true as a Christ follower? It is our actions over time, that will win our spouses over. Are they to are connected with the Holy Spirit? If not it is the believing spouse's desire to wash the other with the word into belief. Trusting the Holy Spirit to work in the heart. This is key for both spouses to come into Christlike love and be lovable. We must be connected to God as Jesus said, apart from me you can do nothing. John15:4 God directs us to Love others as we love ourself. We must care for ourselves and our body as well to be lovable.
1 Corinthians 13:4, "Love suffers long and is kind,...is not provoked...endures all things." Ephesians 5:25, "Husbands, love your just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her..." When the wife understands the love her husband feels for she will turn to him. 1 Corinthians 7:3, "Let the husband render to his wife the affection due we, and likewise the wife to her husband." And most importantly...seek God's council in your situation. Always do that which is love!
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