37 Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and great commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.” (NIV).
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I would say that the process starts by examining the ways in which you love yourself. You love yourself even when acknowledging and accepting the fact of your own faults and imperfections (even though you may hate those same shortcomings). That would imply that loving your neighbor is not conditioned upon the neighbor being without faults or shortcomings of their own, or upon pretending that whatever faults the neighbor may have do not exist. Accept the neighbor's imperfections and humanity, and treat them with the same forbearance that you would want them to exhibit toward you. It also means being able to separate the neighbor from his actions, just as you routinely do with yourself. (As the oft-quoted aphorism puts it, "Hate the sin, but not the sinner.") Reflect the same grace in actions toward others that God has shown you for Jesus' sake. Act with compassion toward them, as in the parable of the Good Samaritan, in which Jesus specifically said that the Samaritan had been the one who had acted as a neighbor to the man who had been beaten and robbed. Look out for their well-being (Philippians 2:4). Pay attention to their welfare and needs, and serve them by helping to meet those needs. Build them up through your words and speech. Encourage them, appreciate them, and speak kindly to them. Share their joys and sorrows with them. Forgive them when they fall short of your expectations or hopes, just as you routinely forgive or excuse yourself.
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