For follow-up discussion and general commentary on the topic. Comments are sorted chronologically.
Richard Holtzman Sr.
I am the author of the question. Matthew 19:9 does not seem applicable in that neither my wife nor I remarried. We each agree the marriage should not have ended. We’ve forgiven each other and believe by God’s word, He has forgiven us. I was told in that neither remarried, we remain biblically married. Are we? Lastly, we’ve shared our desire to remarry and seeking God’s will for us.
Wesley Smith
As I read scripture and understand it, yes you are stilled married. Genesis 2:24 states a man shall cleave to his wife and they shall become one flesh. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus reiterated this and said divorce is permissible only in cases of unchastity, Matthew 5:32. Later, in 19:6, “…What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate”. My understanding is if you divorce in the eyes of the law, you are still married in the eyes of God. And 19:9 informs us if you marry someone else you are committing adultery.
Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 7:11 that if the wife leaves she is to remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. As the husband he should not send her away. I am using the NASB.
I’m a widower and have been for 8 years. I desire to remarry. However, the women that I have met do not meet the requirements of scripture; therefore, I remain single for now.
Jack Gutknecht
This is an interesting question, Richard. I feel for you. Once in my ministry at a small church near Milwaukee, WI, I was asked to remarry a precious divorced couple who were attending. They now were bright lights for Jesus. Bob did a fantastic job of ushering. And Mary & Bob invited me into their home to discuss the gospel more than just once. I remarried them in an official beautiful church wedding because they had kept themselves for each other since they separated.